It make me laugh when all i ever hear
is baby you fine
jus like a glass of wine
It never really crossed my mind
that all you ever wanted was
A shot in line , jus to taste my pie
It makes me Laugh When all I ever see
Is that brother in the corner looking at me
Blowing me kisses, winking his eyes
Acting like you want me
Telling me Lies
It make be Laugh when all i ever feel
Is pain in my vains ,From keeping it all in
Hatred in my eyes
From the people who neva tried
Making their family wishing they would jus die
It makes me Laugh to sit here and cry
looking out the world wishing reality would just come alive
people walking around with their heads held high
to shy to look down to help a single life
This world is Fucked up and you know i'm Right
To scared to speak up , To afraid to fight
And
It makes me laugh to sit here and watch
as this beautiful world just falls apart
who's to be ashamed
Materialistic dames or the fresh fitted niggas
we should all take blame
it breaks my heart to watch it all dissaper down the drain
It just makes me laugh to sit here shame
when i could be out there making a name
donations to children,helping the homeless
we all need love we just have to show it
No betta way to prove but to get out there and do it
I'm done laughing
Thursday, February 23, 2012
Ha Dan Over Me ?
You lay up here like i dnt know wat's going on
Boy i'm not that damn foolish you got me all wrong
I knew you went to her house
Tried to tell me that you where just going out
Ha you thought you had you game all planed huh?
Trynna to play two girls all at once.
But that's where you thought wrong.
I know who ya otha was
Danielle is it, yea that's her
She stand about 5"9
Light skin, deep eyes
She rocks a low brim
And an ass as flat as her chest
Damn boy i'm weak at that
You couldn't find betta
Cause aint no otha as wetta
But i could do hella betta
You thought everytime you went out
I was home all alone crying in ya sweater
Every time you left the ex came over.
Just like old time he bent that ass ova
woke that pussy up like it was fogers
ha we did it in that brand knew range rover.
so go head and have ya fun
I'm gone tolse up the one
and say fuck you hun
cause baby i'm threw
No more of ya lame ass games
And ya tired ass bed fram ha !
But b4 i leave you hi and dry
there's a lil secret that i just have to tell
That girl Danielle that you been creeping wit
She used to be a man
Name used to be Dan
Oh but you remember Dan
he was ya number on fan
Boy i'm not that damn foolish you got me all wrong
I knew you went to her house
Tried to tell me that you where just going out
Ha you thought you had you game all planed huh?
Trynna to play two girls all at once.
But that's where you thought wrong.
I know who ya otha was
Danielle is it, yea that's her
She stand about 5"9
Light skin, deep eyes
She rocks a low brim
And an ass as flat as her chest
Damn boy i'm weak at that
You couldn't find betta
Cause aint no otha as wetta
But i could do hella betta
You thought everytime you went out
I was home all alone crying in ya sweater
Every time you left the ex came over.
Just like old time he bent that ass ova
woke that pussy up like it was fogers
ha we did it in that brand knew range rover.
so go head and have ya fun
I'm gone tolse up the one
and say fuck you hun
cause baby i'm threw
No more of ya lame ass games
And ya tired ass bed fram ha !
But b4 i leave you hi and dry
there's a lil secret that i just have to tell
That girl Danielle that you been creeping wit
She used to be a man
Name used to be Dan
Oh but you remember Dan
he was ya number on fan
When that ass went to jail
Broken Teen
I can't stand you now
every time your around
you always wanna clown
You call yourself a mother
but for a while now
You been nothing but a bother
A mother is someone who is there for you
no matter what
you wasn't there for my first kiss
you wasn't there when i got dissed
you never told me that my heart could get broke
you never told me that love could make a girl choke
A mother is someone who knows me betta than i know myself
you didn't know wat to say when my teach asked you wat i was best at
you didn't know that i cried my self asleep for a month because of the hurt
you didn't know that i was close to begin dead, cause of a stupid mistake
A mother is post to know all the signs of a chill that's ill
Where the fuck was you was i was suicidal
Where the fuck was you when they was taking me to jail
Where the fuck was you when that nigga came for me afta he made bail
And WHERE THE FUCK WAS YOU WHEN THEY WAS TRYNNA PUT ME IN A ANGER CLASS.
DO I LOOK LIKE I HAVE FUCKING ANGER PROBS TO YOU HUH?
I wish you would stop calling ya self my mother
Cause that's the last thing i see you as
Your not my fucking mother
Your my mama ha ma best friend
you may not have been there for my lowest points
but you was there through everything
I remember you telling my teach that i wasn't the best at anything
because i was great at everything i did
I remember you telling me that the only way ma heart would break was if you broke it
I remember you telling me that love was something that would take me by surprise each and every day.
I didn't know how to tell you in person
cause you know how i am with words
but i love you mama with all of my heart
every time your around
you always wanna clown
You call yourself a mother
but for a while now
You been nothing but a bother
A mother is someone who is there for you
no matter what
you wasn't there for my first kiss
you wasn't there when i got dissed
you never told me that my heart could get broke
you never told me that love could make a girl choke
A mother is someone who knows me betta than i know myself
you didn't know wat to say when my teach asked you wat i was best at
you didn't know that i cried my self asleep for a month because of the hurt
you didn't know that i was close to begin dead, cause of a stupid mistake
A mother is post to know all the signs of a chill that's ill
Where the fuck was you was i was suicidal
Where the fuck was you when they was taking me to jail
Where the fuck was you when that nigga came for me afta he made bail
And WHERE THE FUCK WAS YOU WHEN THEY WAS TRYNNA PUT ME IN A ANGER CLASS.
DO I LOOK LIKE I HAVE FUCKING ANGER PROBS TO YOU HUH?
I wish you would stop calling ya self my mother
Cause that's the last thing i see you as
Your not my fucking mother
Your my mama ha ma best friend
you may not have been there for my lowest points
but you was there through everything
I remember you telling my teach that i wasn't the best at anything
because i was great at everything i did
I remember you telling me that the only way ma heart would break was if you broke it
I remember you telling me that love was something that would take me by surprise each and every day.
I didn't know how to tell you in person
cause you know how i am with words
but i love you mama with all of my heart
Hand and Hand
Baby i want to take your hand
Cause i wanna be that one and only gurl
i feel in my heart
that you and me could
be betta
there's nothing more
greater
than the love
of my price charming
But baby i have doubts
about me an you
i'm a lil scared
about the things
your willing to bare
i want to make this clear
i'm not willing to share
so if hos gone be on you
like they ya dime
then i'm out
cause baby i sure
Dnt have the time
So baby i gne go head
and grab ya hand as tight as i can
make a wish that it will all
work out for us in the end
will always be there
Cause i wanna be that one and only gurl
i feel in my heart
that you and me could
be betta
there's nothing more
greater
than the love
of my price charming
But baby i have doubts
about me an you
i'm a lil scared
about the things
your willing to bare
i want to make this clear
i'm not willing to share
so if hos gone be on you
like they ya dime
then i'm out
cause baby i sure
Dnt have the time
So baby i gne go head
and grab ya hand as tight as i can
make a wish that it will all
work out for us in the end
will always be there
I miss You
I can't see how i let you go
All i do is think about you
When we would just stare
Into each others eyes and
Just fall out laughing
They way you would hold
Me in your arms when
Ever i was hurt.
How you would kiss my
Forehead to cheer me up
When ever i was mad.
Or the sent of your spray
Would linger on me .
How your voice made me quiver
Ever time you told me you loved me
Or how you whipped
My tears away every time i cried
You always had an ear for me
When ever i needed someone
to talk to.
I miss everything about you .
The way you
Walk
Talk
Dance
They you would tilt
your head to one side
before you told me a joke.
They way your face would lite up
every time you made me laugh.
They way you pick me up
And spin me around
Until we both got dizzy and just
Layed in the grass watching
The clouds go by.
Everyday i wake up regretting how ever let you go
And i'm so mad at myself for letting that happen
But the point of it is that your happy now
I MISS YOU MORE EACH AND EVERY DAY
I L.O.V.E YOU NO MATTER WAT
All i do is think about you
When we would just stare
Into each others eyes and
Just fall out laughing
They way you would hold
Me in your arms when
Ever i was hurt.
How you would kiss my
Forehead to cheer me up
When ever i was mad.
Or the sent of your spray
Would linger on me .
How your voice made me quiver
Ever time you told me you loved me
Or how you whipped
My tears away every time i cried
You always had an ear for me
When ever i needed someone
to talk to.
I miss everything about you .
The way you
Walk
Talk
Dance
They you would tilt
your head to one side
before you told me a joke.
They way your face would lite up
every time you made me laugh.
They way you pick me up
And spin me around
Until we both got dizzy and just
Layed in the grass watching
The clouds go by.
Everyday i wake up regretting how ever let you go
And i'm so mad at myself for letting that happen
But the point of it is that your happy now
I MISS YOU MORE EACH AND EVERY DAY
I L.O.V.E YOU NO MATTER WAT
Really!!!!!!!!!!!!
ALL I NEED IS ONE MIC TO TELL
THIS COUNTRY WHATS REALLY GOING ON
THIS WORLD IS SO FUCKED UPPED RITE NOW
THERE ARE SO MANY BLACK ON BLACK CRIMES
SO MANY OVER WIEGHT PEOPLE
THERE ARE PREGNANT TEENS OUT THE ASS.
TEENAGE BOY OUT HERE ON THE CORNER SELLING DRUGS
HELL THERE ARE EVEN PEOPLE A SHAMED TO BE BLACK
I MEAN WHY IN THE HELL DO WE HAVE FUCCKING GANGS
I DNT UNDERSTAND THAT SHIT MYSELF.
THESE BLOODZ AND CRIPS SHOOTING EACH OTHER CAUSE
OF WHAT COLOR THEY WEARING...
NIGGAS COMING AT FEMALE WITH NO KINDA OF RESPECT
FIRST WORDS OUT THEY MOUTH IS HEY SEXY
SECOND WORDS OUT THE MOUTH IS BABY YOU A FREAK
LAST WORD OUT THE MOUTH IS LET ME GET THAT NUMBER
HA AND LADIES AINT NO BETTER
WEARING HOE ASS CLOTHES TO GET A GUYS ATTENTION
THEN GET MAD CAUSE HE TREATING YOU LIKE YOU SOME KIND OF HO
OH LIKE YOU DIDN'T GIVE HIM A REASON TO BELIEVE OTHER WISE
WHY ARE FEMALE SO QUICK TO PUT DOWN ANOTHER FEMALE HUH?
I DON'T GET THAT SHIT EITHER.
YOU WALK AROUND DESTROING ANOTHER GIRL SELF ESTEEM CAUSE
YOURS IS IN SHATTERED PIECES.
MAN I DNT EVEN THINK I COULD HAVE A KID IN THIS WORLD.
I MEAN EVER OTHER COMMERCIAL IS TELLING THE WORLD TO GET IN SHAPE
OR THAT 1 IN 4 TEEN WILL GET AN STD
OR 1 IN 5 WILL BECOME A PREGO IN HIGH SCHOOL
EVERY WERE YOU TURN THEY SELLING SEX.
I HONESTLY THINK HIP-HOP IS DEAD
IT'S NOT LIKE IT WAS BACK IN THE DAY B4 I WAS EVEN THAUGHT OF.
EVERY RAP SONG IS ABOUT WEE,SEX,MONEY,KILLING
I MEAN IS THAT ALL THEY CAN RAP ABOUT.
SOME OF THESE NEW ARTIST NEED TO YOUTBE N.W.A, PUBLIC ENEMIE,
SLICK RICK, SPECIAL ED ALL THE GREATS, HELL EVEN QUEEN LATIFA, MC LYTE, MOS DEFF MAN
I GUESS YOU CAN'T CALL THIS A POEM.
JUS A TEENAGE GIRL SPEAKING HER MIND.
A Real Man
Why should i give all of me
You lucky that you getting part of me
But pardon me if i make myself too exclusive
But I'm looking For a
Respectable
Considerable
Available Young Man
A Man that makes me smile
Even when i'm down
A Man who challenges me
Who Brings Out The Best in me
A Man will fall for me flaws and all
A Man who will help correct my mistakes
A Man who will Stand by me when i feel defeated
Yea I'm Looking For A Real Man So What Shoot Me
Stay Blessed and Beautiful Ladies and Gents XO <3
You lucky that you getting part of me
But pardon me if i make myself too exclusive
But I'm looking For a
Respectable
Considerable
Available Young Man
A Man that makes me smile
Even when i'm down
A Man who challenges me
Who Brings Out The Best in me
A Man will fall for me flaws and all
A Man who will help correct my mistakes
A Man who will Stand by me when i feel defeated
Yea I'm Looking For A Real Man So What Shoot Me
Stay Blessed and Beautiful Ladies and Gents XO <3
Lesbians!
First of Lesbians are like the SHIT! My best friend/sister is Bisexual (I call her part Lesbian part Straight) Just to have my own little twist on it.
Any who i like freaking admire Lesbians for some reason the best reasons. They are confident,sexy,strong,beautiful,loving people. and the same with gay guys.
The struggles that they go through and fight to be who they are. To not have someone label them for liking what they like.It's really an empowering thing to witness . And it fucking sucks that there are so many fucking hateful people in the world who want to stop people from finding and being with their true love. Weather it's you a Lesbian , Gay, Bisexual,Straight. Whether it's someones nationality, occupation,where they grew up at, rich or poor. None of that should matter as long as the love is there. Because true love doesn't
Any who i like freaking admire Lesbians for
The struggles that they go through and fight to be who they are. To not have someone label them for liking what they like.It's really an empowering thing to witness . And it fucking sucks that there are so many fucking hateful people in the world who want to stop people from finding and being with their true love. Weather it's you a Lesbian , Gay, Bisexual,Straight. Whether it's someones nationality, occupation,where they grew up at, rich or poor. None of that should matter as long as the love is there. Because true love doesn't
discriminate
! ( Love is the Shit)
And one thing that get me is when guys find out that a girl is Bisexual and just assume that there is going to be a three sum. That blows my fucking mind. Just because someone is Bi doesn't mean that they want to share the intimacy and love with a third party. Oh and the infamous "Your too fine to like girls/guys " Like wtf how is someone too fine to like the same sex. I personally think that's like the stupidest thing to say to anyone.
SN: LESBAINS ARE STILL THE SHIT!
Stay Blessed and Beautiful Ladies and Gents X0<3
Ps. I'm straight :)
So much Hate
I have lost all respect for the man who helped my Mom make me. He calls himself a man but i don't see it all i see is a stingy piece of shit that is going bald and missing damn near all his teeth in the front and who has been a janitor his whole fucking life.
My mom is my dad, she is my best friend, and she is also my mother. As i look back on the years of my child hood all i can only remember my sperm donor coming home from work, sleeping all day, yelling at us to get him some ice water, and every blue moon hell do something nice for us. I have never seen this man cook a damn thing my 19 yrs of living, i have never seen this man clean shit, i have never seen him willingly give us money when we needed it. He never came to none of our sporting events. You know when it came time for my prom it killed him to give me $60 fucking dollars so i can get my nails done and have money to eat with. When my mom spent her own money for a $249 dollar dress , $40 dollar shoes , $45 for the damn prom ticket (I went with friends) and and $60 dollars for me to get my hair done. Not including that last min shit because my dress was falling off me..
I just can't see how i ever used to be daddy's little girl i always been glued to my mom .every where she went i went.and still till this day I literally stalk her when see's off constantly asking her where she was going!
And this piece of shit sorry excuse of a wana be father has got the fucking balls to CHEAT! he has the fucking balls to cheat on my Mom with this bitch that used to be his boss. She is an ugly ass bitch that watched me grow up.And i swear if she never would have gotten fired i would have stabbed that bitch in her fucking chest. and then shoot my sperm donor in the balls (In my mind this would solve all my probs)
What kills me more is how my sister and brother fucking praise his ass like he is someone to fear, he aint nothing but a coward pussy ass bitch who needs to just leave and never fucking return! But my sister and brother don't know about his recent bullshit.
Back here in January I was looking in his phone (Nosy Habit ) Any who i seen what i saw , thought on it seeked advise, and then finally confronted him and told my mom. You would think sense i found out he would stop the shit right. Oh no that would be to easy This spineless Piece of shit keeps it up.
I looked in his phone to see if anything new. And what do you know The home wrecking bitch sends a picture of her ugly self to him and he toothless ass gone say "Damn you sexy as hell! Luv you!" . Are you fucking kidding me the bitch had on more make up then the girl Mimi who used to star on the Drew Carry Show. Ugh!
Well this go round i'm doing shit my way. Because obviously being up front didn't do shit. Mark my fucking words I be damned if my Mom hurts and this mother fucka don't suffer for it. (Nothing drastic) But my manipulating ways will be involved that's for sure.
Don't get me wrong i love my dad for giving me life and being there every now and then.....but i hope all this bites him in his balls.
SN: I'll Burn in hell before i let him walk me down the aisle and give me away at my own wedding. How i see you have to be a father in order to have such an honor. Witch is why i pray that my grandfather is still living so he can do the honors.
Stay Blessed and Beautiful Ladies and Gents XO <3
My mom is my dad, she is my best friend, and she is also my mother. As i look back on the years of my child hood all i can only remember my sperm donor coming home from work, sleeping all day, yelling at us to get him some ice water, and every blue moon hell do something nice for us. I have never seen this man cook a damn thing my 19 yrs of living, i have never seen this man clean shit, i have never seen him willingly give us money when we needed it. He never came to none of our sporting events. You know when it came time for my prom it killed him to give me $60 fucking dollars so i can get my nails done and have money to eat with. When my mom spent her own money for a $249 dollar dress , $40 dollar shoes , $45 for the damn prom ticket (I went with friends) and and $60 dollars for me to get my hair done. Not including that last min shit because my dress was falling off me..
I just can't see how i ever used to be daddy's little girl i always been glued to my mom .every where she went i went.and still till this day I literally stalk her when see's off constantly asking her where she was going!
And this piece of shit sorry excuse of a wana be father has got the fucking balls to CHEAT! he has the fucking balls to cheat on my Mom with this bitch that used to be his boss. She is an ugly ass bitch that watched me grow up.And i swear if she never would have gotten fired i would have stabbed that bitch in her fucking chest. and then shoot my sperm donor in the balls (In my mind this would solve all my probs)
What kills me more is how my sister and brother fucking praise his ass like he is someone to fear, he aint nothing but a coward pussy ass bitch who needs to just leave and never fucking return! But my sister and brother don't know about his recent bullshit.
Back here in January I was looking in his phone (Nosy Habit ) Any who i seen what i saw , thought on it seeked advise, and then finally confronted him and told my mom. You would think sense i found out he would stop the shit right. Oh no that would be to easy This spineless Piece of shit keeps it up.
I looked in his phone to see if anything new. And what do you know The home wrecking bitch sends a picture of her ugly self to him and he toothless ass gone say "Damn you sexy as hell! Luv you!" . Are you fucking kidding me the bitch had on more make up then the girl Mimi who used to star on the Drew Carry Show. Ugh!
Well this go round i'm doing shit my way. Because obviously being up front didn't do shit. Mark my fucking words I be damned if my Mom hurts and this mother fucka don't suffer for it. (Nothing drastic) But my manipulating ways will be involved that's for sure.
Don't get me wrong i love my dad for giving me life and being there every now and then.....but i hope all this bites him in his balls.
SN: I'll Burn in hell before i let him walk me down the aisle and give me away at my own wedding. How i see you have to be a father in order to have such an honor. Witch is why i pray that my grandfather is still living so he can do the honors.
Stay Blessed and Beautiful Ladies and Gents XO <3
Friday, February 17, 2012
Shallow
Shallow- lacking depth; superficial: a mind that is not narrow but shallow.
Okay so me and my friend have been having this argument for the longest . She calls me Shallow just because i have a preference in who i date or who i like . I can't help what i'm attracted to but she seem to have this idea that I only date and like "Light skin Pretty Boy Wanna Be Thugs "
Okay so me and my friend have been having this argument for the longest . She calls me Shallow just because i have a preference in who i date or who i like . I can't help what i'm attracted to but she seem to have this idea that I only date and like "Light skin Pretty Boy Wanna Be Thugs "
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| Disclaimer I don't own this picture. located on >> http://thecutestboysever.tumblr.com |
But that's not even the case yes i'm attracted to light skinned boy but i love all boys i don't have a set in stone type. I taste ranges from , thugs, skater boys,cali swag,retro,pretty boys,scholars, jocks, Black,White,Hispanic,Asian,Irish,Canadian, German, Mixed ,Etc as long as i'm physically and mentally attracted to you all is good right . And i look for certain qualities besides appearance like If they have a great sense of humor , do they have ambitions, do they strive for success, are they looking for long term or just a looking for a fuck buddy.Are they controlling etc. I don't just base my opinion on appearance when it comes to a guy i like.
Wednesday, February 8, 2012
Maturing
I went through stages in my life. when i was little i had mad friends i was in the what you would call popular group i guess \(- _-)/ any who when i was in the third grade I supper glued Mrs. Blazer to a chair. and had gotten kicked off the bus for jumping this other little girl. << She had it coming she was white and called me a dirty nigga. on a bus full of black people. I wasn't just going to let that slide not one bit. Any who i ended up getting kicked out of the elementary school and had to transfer to another one.
Roosevelt let me tell you i was so out of my element. I went from a school that was mostly Black people to a school were there was mostly white people. But i didn't have a problem with making friends. I never did. soon i became part of a group that you would consider pint size mean girls. it was like everyone wanted to be associate with us just because we traveled in a pack and matched each other. And i did things back then to hurt other peoples feelings that i didn't even mean to do. and as i look back i think wow! was it even that serious i mean for crying out loud we were 9.
Worst thing ever happened that summer my best friend Mersadies Olivia Bakers died a tragic death. After her passing i went into depression mode and ate my feelings away. by the time 7th grade hit i weighed 190 lb wearing a size 24 standing a 5'0 tall. every day that year i dreading going to school. The girls would talk about me because i had never had aperm, I mean relaxer. and i never had gotten a weave before because my hair was long, they yelled and called me nappy headed just because i didn't straighten my hair. i got called fat ass, no neck, and everything else. and everyday i would go home and cry my eyes. Back then the only people who helped me through everything was Isis,Jazmyn Chelseay if it wasn't for them idk what would happen but luckly 8th grade year i began to loose some of the weight and became more social than i ever was i was happy to go to school then because i knew it would be a good day.I now look back at all the girls and boys who made fun of me was either jealous that my hair was real or insecure about their own selves so they had to pick on me because i was an easy target. Back then i also let people walk all over me.
High School hit i had lost 40 lb and wearing a size 14 and standing at 5'4 I loved what i had accomplished and i loved who i had molded myself to be. I took no shit from nobody and once i started to date one of the well known boys in school, Not an athlete or anything like that just a really attractive guy who knew everyone. and that's when shit hit the fan, bitches were coming out of every witch way calling me la weaver and saying i was fat and ugly. and i started to believe the nasty rumors until i start noticing alot of the really cute guys in school was asking for my number and wanting to date me. that when i realized i had haters. because these girls only knew my name and they talked so much shit about me. i didn't even know half of them.
Even though it's only been a year since i was in high school i feel that i grew as a person. i'm no longer angry at the world. I don't blame anyone for the things that i do or the things i regret no doing. i stopped worrying about the What if and Maybes and started living for today, I started living for me. and that is something that i never did i always tried my best to please other people.
One thing about me that will never change is my personality witch is alot to take in. If i don't like you trust you know that i don't like you. i wont be rude about it unless you take me there. I love all my friends and family unconditionally you fuck with them you fuck with me. I'm just that kind of person. I'm sweet when i want to be. I have sick sense of humor, I flirt all the time even with girls and i don't be meaning to. but some how alot of people take my mean mug as a come heather face. I'm loyal to those who have my back no mater wat. If your looking for someone to tell you what you want to hear i'm not the one i will always be honest when it comes to my opinion. One last thing i will never say something behind your back that i wouldn't say directly to your face.
Stay Blessed and Beautiful Ladies and Gents XO <3
SN:Thank you Jae for always being there you are more than a true friend to me you my best friend your my partner and crime, my ride and hide lol but most important your my sister my family love you girly. believe it or not your niceness and ambitiousness rubbed off on me a little
Roosevelt let me tell you i was so out of my element. I went from a school that was mostly Black people to a school were there was mostly white people. But i didn't have a problem with making friends. I never did. soon i became part of a group that you would consider pint size mean girls. it was like everyone wanted to be associate with us just because we traveled in a pack and matched each other. And i did things back then to hurt other peoples feelings that i didn't even mean to do. and as i look back i think wow! was it even that serious i mean for crying out loud we were 9.
Worst thing ever happened that summer my best friend Mersadies Olivia Bakers died a tragic death. After her passing i went into depression mode and ate my feelings away. by the time 7th grade hit i weighed 190 lb wearing a size 24 standing a 5'0 tall. every day that year i dreading going to school. The girls would talk about me because i had never had a
High School hit i had lost 40 lb and wearing a size 14 and standing at 5'4 I loved what i had accomplished and i loved who i had molded myself to be. I took no shit from nobody and once i started to date one of the well known boys in school, Not an athlete or anything like that just a really attractive guy who knew everyone. and that's when shit hit the fan, bitches were coming out of every witch way calling me la weaver and saying i was fat and ugly. and i started to believe the nasty rumors until i start noticing alot of the really cute guys in school was asking for my number and wanting to date me. that when i realized i had haters. because these girls only knew my name and they talked so much shit about me. i didn't even know half of them.
Even though it's only been a year since i was in high school i feel that i grew as a person. i'm no longer angry at the world. I don't blame anyone for the things that i do or the things i regret no doing. i stopped worrying about the What if and Maybes and started living for today, I started living for me. and that is something that i never did i always tried my best to please other people.
One thing about me that will never change is my personality witch is alot to take in. If i don't like you trust you know that i don't like you. i wont be rude about it unless you take me there. I love all my friends and family unconditionally you fuck with them you fuck with me. I'm just that kind of person. I'm sweet when i want to be. I have sick sense of humor, I flirt all the time even with girls and i don't be meaning to. but some how alot of people take my mean mug as a come heather face. I'm loyal to those who have my back no mater wat. If your looking for someone to tell you what you want to hear i'm not the one i will always be honest when it comes to my opinion. One last thing i will never say something behind your back that i wouldn't say directly to your face.
Stay Blessed and Beautiful Ladies and Gents XO <3
SN:Thank you Jae for always being there you are more than a true friend to me you my best friend your my partner and crime, my ride and hide lol but most important your my sister my family love you girly. believe it or not your niceness and ambitiousness rubbed off on me a little
10 pounds lighter
Yay! I've lost 10 pounds since i started the whole working out twice a day thing and i couldn't be more happier. i'm sleeping better i don't feel as sluggish like i normally do. I t doesn't take forever for me to get up in the morning.
Some tricks i picked up
Some tricks i picked up
- Eatting 6 small healthy meals through the day instead of 3 big meals
- Working out to music that i don't normally listening to. That way i'm more focussed on my work out instead of the lyrics to my favorite song
- YOGA after every hard work out i do i always end it with yoga. It's real relaxing and it makes me feel 10x better afterward
- After working out in the morning i walk my dog. I hate laying around now.
Saturday, February 4, 2012
My sister
One thing that pisses me off is my sister. were about 10 yrs apart and i had a strong dislike for her. Now that were older we can tolerate each other to a certain extent. and she had 2 boys Christopher 7 and Anthony 3
and on fridays and saturdays I babysit her kids so her and my brother in law can go do a little side job (Nothing illegal i promise) and they'll be gone for like 4 to 6 hours. So 4- 6 hours of my time that i could be chilling with friends,going on dates, and everything else i'm babysitting here kids with no PAY. see if i was getting paid to do so i wouldn't care. But i'm not and i'm pissed.
Here is why i get pissed they claim they don't have the money to pay me for baby sitting right. But they can find the money to allow someone else stay in the house. And before christmas all they had was a Ginniepig. So for christmas she buys a dog that has to go to the vet like ever 3 months because of it's wrinkles. and in my head i'm calculating on how much it cost to take the dog back in forth to the vet, and buying special shampoo, and dog food and all these little fancy treats she buys him every week.It comes to about 130.00 a month. and this is how i look at is you can find an extra 130.00 dollars a month but you can't pay me at all to babysit but you couldn't find the money to pay me. Shit really pisses me the fuck off. because i been baby sitting for them for damn near 4 yrs with out pay. .
Just had to vent for a moment.
Stay Blessed and Beautiful Ladies and Gents XO <3
and on fridays and saturdays I babysit her kids so her and my brother in law can go do a little side job (Nothing illegal i promise) and they'll be gone for like 4 to 6 hours. So 4- 6 hours of my time that i could be chilling with friends,going on dates, and everything else i'm babysitting here kids with no PAY. see if i was getting paid to do so i wouldn't care. But i'm not and i'm pissed.
Here is why i get pissed they claim they don't have the money to pay me for baby sitting right. But they can find the money to allow someone else stay in the house. And before christmas all they had was a Ginniepig. So for christmas she buys a dog that has to go to the vet like ever 3 months because of it's wrinkles. and in my head i'm calculating on how much it cost to take the dog back in forth to the vet, and buying special shampoo, and dog food and all these little fancy treats she buys him every week.It comes to about 130.00 a month. and this is how i look at is you can find an extra 130.00 dollars a month but you can't pay me at all to babysit but you couldn't find the money to pay me. Shit really pisses me the fuck off. because i been baby sitting for them for damn near 4 yrs with out pay. .
Just had to vent for a moment.
Stay Blessed and Beautiful Ladies and Gents XO <3
Wednesday, February 1, 2012
Happy Birthday Christopher !
Happy Birthday Chris it's been 7 years since you came into this world and you have been giving us nothing but love . And we are so very proud of you. Your are learning to walk and you are starting to eat with out assistance and we are so proud you have come so far in your journey and you know that we have you back every step of the way. I hope you enjoy today because you deserve to. Love you dearly Your Auntie Tina
Stay Blessed and Beautiful Ladies and Gents XO <3
SN: I'll post a picture of him later
Stay Blessed and Beautiful Ladies and Gents XO <3
SN: I'll post a picture of him later
Need Improvement
Don't you wish you could just have your fairy godmother come in"POOF"great abs without the work
So today i learned a few things about myself. And I'm not really proud of it. so you know that i have been challenging myself to get into shape. right sounds great and all .Well last month i hurt my ankle really bad so most work outs that i wanted to do i couldn't do because of the pain. but i still worked on my arms and I basically just ate healthy all month. and trust me it's killing me. I haven't had a pop in almost two months. And my favorite milkshakes from steak and shake oh how i miss thee. i have been drinking nothing but Green tea, Gatorade, and water and lots of it.Like my grandpa say you got to work from the inside out.
Any who i got up at around 7 put on my work out gear , grabbed the weights and yoga mat and headed to my living room to work out. We have time Warner cables so we have this sports and fitness on demand channel. I notice that all the work outs are about 30 mins long. I'm thinking great no problem I'll just do two a day twice a day.That way i work out for at least two hours a day.
As soon as the work out started i notice that i wasn't as flexible like i was my freshman and sophomore year of high school. I was more fatigue that i normally was and that kind scared me a little. Like wow I'm really out of shape.But I'm not going to give in so easily i have a goal and I'm going to meet it. I don't care if i have to work out five times a day to get there.
 | ||||
| I want my body to look more like hers. Keeping my shape but tone it up Ya know and i will get to this goal |
Stay Blessed and Beautiful Ladies and Gents XO <3
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