Friendship code!

Like I've stated in a previous post. It's only ok to date your bestfriend ex only if their cool with it and are really cool with. Not just saying their cool with it just so they don't sound like a Bitch.   Well i recently just found out that one of my close friends really likes one of the guys i used to talk to and messed with.
   Heres the thing we are all friends and he has always felt so comfortable telling her alot of the problems that he's faceing and they have always been like that.But when she told me that she really is feeling him  i was shocked i couldn't believe at first and i was low key mad but i didn't show it.Or at least i don't think i showed it lol. Any way after listening to her and hearing what she had to say and what her heart and mind was going through. I gave my concent.
   I felt that he is actually closer to her than me and i believe that if they ever got together they  would have a long lasting relationship. Where as if we tried to rekindle the fire i think it would more of a fling. Me and him were more sextually attacted to each other than anything else. So i gave her my concent and i honestly and truly hope that if they become as one that they last as long as they can. Cause i just know that their personalities will clash here and there lol.
    I'm end this by saying if your friend or you like one anothers past partners (Sounds so corny lol) any way of you know that they would last as a relationship and with you it would be a fling. just go ahead and give your concent cause you don't want to be the friend who let their best friend miss out on a great thing for them because you all but hurt. Do the right thing.

 

Stay Blessed and Beautiful Ladies and Gents   XO<3

Realization.

   I know i know it's been awhile since i've shown my face but that's all going to change after today.....
I'm just going to jump right into it. As some of ya'll already know i was in a 5yr relationship with my no current Ex boyfriend _________. Let me just say that he is a great guy deep down inside himself and he was and for ever be my first love. But he will not me the last.
    Through our entire relationship it has been more bad times then there are good and one day i woke up and finally realized that. How he was treating me and acted towards me was not the way i wanted to be treated. And i believed i held on to the hope for to long thinking that he would change. I feel in that stigma that women stay with the bad ones because they think or hope they will change.
  I'm about to go into detail about our relationship. If your going to judge or criticize me then i suggest you leave my blog at this moment because there is only one person who has the right to judge me and that is my creator.
    It all started back in 2007 when we first got together and that was Christmas day. Believe it or not that was the best present i could have ever gotten that year.... Yea yea yea i know i'm a hopeless romantic ha. But everything was good until his games started and his true colors started shining like new money. He began to cheat on me with other girls. If it was any other guy his ass would have been dissed and i would have gotten his ass back but with ______i just let the shit slide we broke and then eventually i took him back. Wy? because i felt that he really and truly loved me and because i was 14 and didn't know any better.
But as the years went on we broke up and got back together on and off and off and on. Well senior year came and we were like the couple to be when we got back together he walked me to my classes held my books my purse did little things like that. when i was sick he did everything to make me feel better. But one day it seemed like he snapped and i was dating a whole different person. He became very aggressive with me. If i said something he didn't like he got mad and called me names. Or if i didn't want to go somewhere with him he would push me. One day he actually slammed my wrist in the door. That's something i never really told any one.... But he told me that he didn't mean to do ti and i forgave him, Then the possessive shit started every time i didn't text him right back he would start saying i was cheating on him and that i didn't love him and all this other bullshit when in reality i doing something that needed my attention. This went own for about two months.
  Then it happened something i swore would never happen. I was coming back to school after spending a week home being sick.... I was so happy i had just gotten paid and i was treating my friend Jaelle and her little sis to breakfast. My phone was fucking on some bullshit. It was allowing me send text but i couldn't receive them.Witch turned _______ into a mad man.....To make a long story short we ended up fight at school. I had a bruised eye a fractured finger and a spranged ankle.
  You would think after this incident i would walk away but i didn't. I was one of those girls making excuses saying well i out my hands on him first so i was actual fight. I was telling people any and everything so they wouldn't think i was crazy. But the looks on their faces said other wise.
   But i can stand here and tell you today that i'm no longer in a toxic relationship with _____.I have moved on and i'm not looking back. I refuse to let myself to ever go through that with anyone else and if your reading this and your in the same situation or know someone that is.Get out NOW! cause 9 times out of 10 i guy who puts his hands on you once will do it again with no problem or he'll threaten to. And don't think that it has to be physical it can be mental to .

Signs You Should Look For
1.Always telling what to and not wear (controlling)
2.Controls you over text
3.Threatens you
4.Calls you name Bitch,slut,hoe,fuck face,dumb ass, ugly
5.Claims your cheating because you haven't called or text him
6.Pushes you around and is very aggressive with you
7.Treats you like his property
8. He puts his hands on you intending to cause pain on you

If any of these apply to you please talk to someone about or get out of the relationship you deserve way better than that. And this goes for guys too!!!


I'm a stronger person because of it. And i'm way more wiser. My motto is never settle for less

Stay blessed and Beautiful Ladies and Gents xo <3

Real Vs Imitation

   I think it's great when you let things and people  inspire your own personal style. Like me i like so much and i have alot of inspiration like tumblr, my favorite artist and actors and my favorite stores inspire my style. But i would NEVER let a web site or someone change me. I see alot of females where i live who have allowed Tumblr to comsume them like seriously they have taking on the life of someone else like the used to be so against drugs and liquor and they would talk about people who took pictures of weed and Bottles of alcohol but now see them doing the same thing. And i don't have a problem with people who live that way. I have a problem with the contradicting i mean why talk about the people who live that way who you have become. I mean these girls think their the shit just because the shop at forever 21 and i'm just like wtf bitch sit the fuck down.
     Like i ran into one of them the other day and She told me that people are walking around looking like me. and i'm just standing there like no yur looking like everbody else. Like she really thought she had set a trend all i'm saying is it's ok to admire someones style and incorporate into your own just don't allow it to take over who you really are just to try and fit in.



Imitation

Real


Whitch would you want to have .....Even though they are both cute as hell :)




Stay blessed and beautiful Ladies and Gents XO <3

Mixed Signals

   Last night I spent quite a few hours talking on the phone with my ex. I honestly did it because of boredom i called Jae but her ass didn't pick and then i called Calvin and he didn't pick up witch is strange. I didn't talk to at all yesterday and i really wanted to.
   Any who me and him were on the phone i told him that i was doing great and that i had thought about him form time to time. But it wasn't one of those damn i miss him type of thoughts it was more like i wonder is he's a live or i wonder if he got help. <<Long story . He even asked what i thought about and i told him . And i guess he kind of took it the wrong way. But we laughed caught up and he apologized for how we broke up. Deep down in side i was kid of glad we broke up. we were to different people that just had things in common and even though that mad us happy the stuff that mad us different were key things you just couldn't ignore. Like I'm a huge family person , when i have a problem i want it solved , when someone in my family needs help I'm there no questions asked.I'm just big on people i like and care about. Notice what i just said lol. But he is not big on family like if someone in his family needs help it depends on who it is and what they need help with. And when it comes to his problem he likes to avoid them. Witch didn't sit right with me because then i would be thinking about until i think i found a solution. And when it comes to people. man oh man. We just didn't mix quite right. Like a recipe without all the ingredients yea it might sound good but once you make it you waiting to throw up.
  Moving along but we talked a lot. he told me that he was looking for me on facebook and that he had dreams about me and all this other stuff and i'm just like awww that's nice. Then the crazy thing was he told me he hadn't talked to his bestfriend since we broke up.Matter of fact he stopped talking to his bestfriend the same day we broke up.It's like I'm getting this sense that he trying to get back with me. The whole time we were on the phone he was calling me babe <<I hate that word. and he was calling me baby. And when i would call him on it he would be like i didn't say nothing. Uhg that pissed me off too.  Oh and then he was saying that is we got married and the last time we broke up. and i'm thinking what you mean last time. there's only been one time. I'm thinking in my head one's enough. Any who it was just a lot of awkwardness.
  A lot of females would probably call me stupid for not getting back with him or working it out because. He's really good looking i mean he's like a 14 not a 10 but a 14 plus he has money, and he's in school etc ect . but i can't be with someone if my hearts not in it. I know who i love and i know who i care about. And he means everything to me. He might not have alot of money, frankly i don't care, he maybe still finding his way in the world (Good thing i'm here to help), But he has my heart, he;s always there when i need him. He gives me all the love and attention i crave and i return it. He's very protective over me. He has Ambition.He know's how to dress, he knows how to shop for things i like. Yea he might work my nerves every now and then,Yea we get  into ridiculous fights, Yes we have been through hell and back, and yes he dresses like a thug. But all of that is what makes me love him even more.
   I'm leave you guys with this advice if you can only take the good in a man/woman than your not meant to be with them. You have to beable to deal with the good,the bad and ugly, That's what makes you guys stronger as one.

     Stay Blessed and Beautiful Ladies and Gents  XO <3

Self-Esteem

         Self-esteem: a realistic respect for or favorable impression of oneself;self-respect.   

      With that being said I believe us as women need to have self-esteem in our selves.We can't rely on society,And our peers to give it to us because at the end of the day your still you no matter what anyone tells you.

     Society shouldn't make you nor break you because everyone is beautiful in their own unique special way. We each have our own preference of Beautiful or Good looking.Beauty is the eye of the beholder. And that's a quote i live by. Now i admit that i have said some hurtful things about someones appearance and i know i shouldn't have. I'm honest enough to tell you guys that. But you shouldn't allow any one and i mean any one to bring you down. I'm living proof I've had people called me a wet back,a coon told me i was ugly,fat , told me i was trifling and called me a hoe.

     What made me lift my head high and made me more confident was everything that they said wasn't true. I know for a fact that i wasn't a hoe because i was with the same guy for almost 5 yrs now. I knew i wasn't fat i was just thick in all the right places. And as for them calling me ugly i just took that as they were threatened by me some how. So every time i heard a female call me names i would just say to myself. She must be insecure and intimidated by me.I would smile and shake my head because i wasn't about to let her get the best of me. She was a non motha fucking factor .

    So hold your head up high. Tell your self every-day your beautiful because you are don't let anyone negative have any affect on because they don't matter only you do. And if they are saying something negative chance are they believe that you are a threat to them. so take it as a compliment and smile and that face. Kill them slowly with you kindness. 

Stay Blessed and Beautiful Ladies and Gents  XO <3
you are someone special and don't let anyone else tell you different :)

         

R.T.O.T.N (Random Thought Of The Night)

Relationships if you want to make a relationship last you have to have trust if your don't trust the other person you will always have doubt and you will always second guess yourself and Them. You will always have trouble believing them and then you'll start lying to them or stop telling them everything. Be honest up front and let them know what they see is what they get and once the relationship grows you can allow to let your skeletons out of the closet to secrets no guilt equals a happy long lasting relationship.

-And never follow the rule "DON'T ASK DON'T TELL" because in the long run they will eventually find out. and ask you about it and they will feel even more hurt because you didn't tell them from the get go. Not telling them makes them start thinking about what other stuff haven't you told them and then the trust get's broken. And you'll never be the same.

   

Stay Blessed and Beautiful Ladies and Gents  XO <3

Jealousy Type B ( Familial Hateration)

 I know personally ,I get hated on all the time when I'm out with my male cousin Trey. First let me explain, he is my favorite cousin i love him like a brother and we are not that far apart in age he is like 2 years older than me.And when he is in town we spend a lot of time together .I remember one time we were at the mall and he was shopping for some summer clothes and i wen along so i could check out some stores and so on. We had walked into Charlotte Russe (Mind you that he absolutely hates going in there ) I went straight for the shoes and he sat down on the little bench watching me look through all the shoes.I turn around to see if he was still there and i notices a girl was like giving me the evil eye so i turned all around because i just knew she wasn't looking about me. But once i realized that her hatred evil glare was toward me we began to have a stare down.She rolled her eyes and made smart remarks at me . My cousin bless his heart thought we knew each other and he gave her s flirty smile, She started waving at him and smirking at me. I finally couldn't take it no more so i yelled out He's my cousin. And she came over trying to play nice saying that she was having a bad day . While my cousin Trey pulled me out the store i calmly  told her that she played herself and it was her lost.
  A lot of females will stare you down and just Assume who ever your walking with or who ever you with has to be your boyfriend so they stare you up and down and give you the death stare just because they want who ever your with. And it's like once they find out that the guy your with is related to you they want to play nice just to get closer to him So watch out for  Type B ladies


Stay Blessed and Beautiful Ladies and Gents  XO <3

Jealousy Type A (The Visual Hater)

   It all starts with the eyes before we speak to a woman or are intoduced to a woman,We visually size her up, assessing what we like and dislike about her.Subconsciously ,whether you know it or not,you are comparing her to yourself. ie:(Her hair is so long and thick,and mine is all thin and kinda short) At that moment you picture yourself having her hair or criticizing her hair.You'll say thing like i bet it's unmanageable,or i bet that's not all her real hair and so on and so forth.
  Many woman experience this same uncomfortable feeling when they walk into a room full of people especially a room full of women they are not familiar with.It's like as soon as you walk into a room you can feel all eyes on you staring holes in the back of your neck and you worry about what their saying, if they are talking about your hair make up, outfit. You begin to make yourself paranoid or you build a wall up so you don't show how uncomfortable you feel.Or you might criticize them before you allow the thoughts creep into your head that their talking about you.I can honestly say that would be me. whether it was a classroom,a grocery store even the mall and pool i would talk about them from head to toe to make myself feel better about me.But as i gotten older i realized how childish and foolish i had been to say things about someone i didn't even know. Now i just think to myself i wonder who did her hair.or i would like to try that hair style or i think i could rock the look.

  Always stay positive about yourself don't hate just admire and try to accomplish the same for yourself

  Stay Blessed and Beautiful Ladies and Gents  XO <3

Jealousy in Females

"Look at her breast"
"I know that's a rent-a-car"
"Those are contacts"
"That is not her real hair"

^^^^Those are examples of hater/envious women
There is a common thread among haters.Most often the people who hate on others are  intimidated,insecure,and or jealous about a certain characteristic they see in the person or people they are hating on.This characteristic is something that they feel they could never possess or gain.Feeling this way makes the hater feel inadequate.It is easier for these people to criticize others than change themselves.It's like we as women already have this natural reaction to compare ourselves to there women with out even noticing it. I can honestly admit i do it all the time.
   Case and Point. I get jealous of my best friend Jae all the time.She has a talent with make up that i could never understand or do it myself.And she is obber friendly to like everyone,Plus her ambition that's one thing i can say urks me sometime. Even though i'm genuinely proud of her and support her and everything she dose I tend to compare her to me. Even though i shouldn't. I'm myself is ambitious but i'm a huge procrastinator and i get bored with thing once they stop becoming a challenge for me. So i switch my ideas a lot. But not Jae she has stuck with her same dream since i met her. And I can say i have to but i kinda threw plan A away and now i'm working on plan C while i wait for the acceptance in plan B. At the end of the day that is my sister and i love her dearly we wouldn't be as close as we are if we didn't fight or envy each other every now and then.

 Stay Blessed and Beautiful Ladies and Gents  XO <3